


love game

by yeonheon



Category: VERIVERY (Band)
Genre: Bottom Lee Dongheon, Canon Compliant, M/M, Top Ju Yeonho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:21:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27645407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yeonheon/pseuds/yeonheon
Summary: After playing the pepero game for the second time with Yeonho, Dongheon has an epiphany.
Relationships: Ju Yeonho/Lee Dongheon
Comments: 4
Kudos: 36





	love game

It’s nearly the end of a long day of schedules, and it really should have been one like so many others that came before it, routine as always, both exhausting and flying by like no time had passed at all. It was supposed to be just another day in the life of idols promoting their newest album, but they’ve just done their live stage and are packing up, preparing to head out of the broadcast station soon, and in all honesty, Dongheon is shocked, thinks it must be some kind of miracle that he hasn’t dropped dead of heart failure by now. 

It’s been going for hours, the way that his heart hasn’t stopped pounding in this dull but deep, steady rhythm, almost painful in how hard it is, Dongheon feeling like his entire chest compresses on each beat, occasionally spiking in speed or skipping beats entirely, leaving him suddenly breathless and sending his blood rushing red-hot through his veins whenever he thinks about it, about everything that had happened. 

Dongheon’s face feels hot, too, in that same sharp, strange kind of ache as when he’s been laughing and smiling for too long, and it’s like the more that he tries to calm himself down, the more that he tries to bring himself under control, the more intense it becomes. 

Dongheon supposes this is entirely his own fault, because he hadn’t quite thought it all through when he had agreed to what had been proposed for the filming of the pick-the-ending-fairy segment for their live stage today. It just hadn’t seemed like such a big deal at the time, when he was asked to play the pepero game with all of the members one after another. It was supposed to be just the kind of wild, stupid, embarrassing game like the hundreds of others that they’ve played since debut. The fans would love it, and it would earn the group some much-needed extra broadcast time as they continued to try to establish themselves in the industry. 

It seemed like a win-win for everyone involved, and Dongheon certainly didn’t see any problem with it. He was comfortable enough with himself and with his groupmates to know that it was just for fun and didn’t mean anything at all. This was part of being an idol, doing these shocking, fanservice type of things, and Dongheon was happy enough to do it as long as everyone else was too. 

Heck, it wasn’t even the first time that Dongheon had played the pepero game with one of his members. Of course, last year during a vlive, he had played with Yeonho, and that hadn’t been a big deal at all, at least, it definitely hadn’t seemed like such a big deal at the time. Dongheon remembers how he had even thought it was kind of funny that he and Yeonho were randomly paired together, almost like fate was playing some kind of prank on them, pairing the two of them together for a fanservice game like that and making things a little weird between two completely platonic best friends. 

Because yeah, truthfully, Dongheon does remember how it had felt pretty weird back then, how it had left him feeling a little strange to play the pepero game with Yeonho. They hadn’t even gotten all that close that first time, only their noses had brushed, but Dongheon distinctly remembers being so overcome with the strangest, sudden shyness that he had to back out quite early lest he melt into a puddle on the floor, and he can’t deny that he hadn’t been able to think about anything else for days after it happened. And yes, time had gone on, it had been over a year, and it had all become this weird, rosy memory like a long-forgotten dream, but every time he thinks back to it, it makes his heart start racing all over again. 

But regardless, today’s experience was on another level entirely. To call it insanity would be a massive understatement, and Dongheon has been more or less on total autopilot since, unable to think about anything at all really, his mind having completely left his body, leaving nothing but that same weird feeling from a year ago stirring in his chest, now amplified a million times as he turns the same thoughts over and over and over again. 

It wasn’t the fact that he had played with all of the members this time that was driving him so crazy, no, it wasn’t that at all. Truthfully, Dongheon hardly remembers any of his experience with Gyehyeon, Minchan, Hoyoung, Yongseung, or Kangmin. Those five had pretty much been nothing but a blur to him, and his games with them had all gone by so quickly that he can’t even remember the exact order or any of the particular details. All he can remember, really, is the laughter and the yelling all around them, the staff going wild behind the cameras, but it had all been automatic during those games, like muscle memory, cultivated from years now of being in front of the camera and learning how to be entertaining and to go along with the energy in the room even when your head is somewhere else entirely. 

The truth is, it had been that first game with Yeonho that had left Dongheon so shaken, that had left Dongheon literally shaking when he had moved on to play with Gyehyeon after, and it was because Dongheon had finally, after over a year, been able to understand what that strange feeling was all that time ago, when him and Yeonho had played this game before. It was that same exact feeling, and it’s the same one that he often has when he’s with Yeonho even in their daily lives. It’s been like that for a long time, and now that Dongheon has recognized it for what it is, he can’t believe how long it took for him to realize. 

Yeonho had been the one that Dongheon had chosen to play the first round of the game with, the one who would be giving him his “first kiss” as the staff had joked, and Dongheon had thought that he had understood exactly why he had chosen Yeonho for that very special honor, and with an affectionate backhug for good measure. It had seemed so obvious to pick Yeonho first. Of course it would be Yeonho that Dongheon would want to choose, it was _Yeonho_ , and what they had asked Dongheon to do was so crazy, it went without saying that he would pick the person that he was the most comfortable with, his favorite person. 

And as expected, it had all been easy enough at first. The two of them had played around a bit, acted out a few seconds of a stupid scene improvised on the spot, and Yeonho had sang to him and was hilarious and charming as always, and Dongheon really had, in those first few moments, felt quite at ease. That was just Yeonho’s magic, and it was why Dongheon loved him so much, Yeonho always the soothing calm to Dongheon’s chaotic storm. Dongheon had certainly been able to put on a brave front even in the face of what was about to happen, even as his heart had quickly started to pick up speed as Yeonho came closer, but just like the first time that he had played with Yeonho, Dongheon had gone into it feeling relaxed, and almost confident. 

But it didn’t take long for Dongheon to realize the critical mistake that he had made, that critical misunderstanding of himself more than anything else, because as his eyes slipped closed and Yeonho stepped in closer, as Dongheon bit down obediently into the pepero following Yeonho’s wildly sexy command for him to “bite,” a command that made Dongheon feel all hot and bothered beyond rational explanation, Yeonho biting down on the other end of the pepero just a moment later, it was like Dongheon was hit with it all at once, like a tsunami rushing forward and consuming him whole, but by then, they had already passed the point of no return, and all he could do was let himself be washed away. 

And really, the whole game had only lasted about ten seconds, but it had seemed like the longest ten seconds of Dongheon’s life as Yeonho closed his own eyes and bit down into the pepero, inching his way closer and closer, Dongheon’s heart jumping up to his throat and his skin tingling with heat as Yeonho continued without hesitation, Yeonho tilting his face and moving in even closer with a bold confidence that Dongheon had never seen from him before, one that left Dongheon frozen until Yeonho was so close that Dongheon could feel the warmth of Yeonho’s face, the warmth of Yeonho’s mouth, melting him down drop by drop by drop. 

And it was like Dongheon’s sensitivity had been dialed up to its maximum, like he could feel the shift of every molecule and atom between them and connecting them as Yeonho moved in closer and closer and closer, all the way up until the pivotal moment when Yeonho’s lips touched his, Dongheon trembling, buckling in place as his heart stopped entirely. 

And that moment, that had been it, that had been everything and meant everything, because any other person in the same situation would’ve immediately pulled away right then and there, maybe laughed it off and made a big show for the camera. Even Dongheon himself, when he would go on to play the game with the other members, would do exactly that, would quickly pull away once they got too close to crossing the line, allowing just enough fanservice to please the fans while maintaining his and his members’ personal boundaries. 

But with Yeonho, it was all different, and there was no excuse for it, there was no explanation. Yeonho wasn’t even holding Dongheon in place like the other members would during their turns, and it was a small, subtle thing, but it was critical, because it left Dongheon as the one with complete control of the situation. Unlike with the other members, when playing with Yeonho, Dongheon was at all times free to pull away whenever he wanted to, was free to end the game whenever he wanted to, and when Yeonho kissed him, there was no rational reason for him not to choose that moment as the logical exit. 

And yet, against all reason, against all expectation, for a few insane, terrifying, incredible moments, when Yeonho kissed him, Dongheon didn’t immediately pull away, and even more insane, and terrifying, and incredible, was how Yeonho too kept going, seemingly unphased by what was happening, the press of his lips at first just a gentle, barely-there touch, an accident, to what was undeniably a full press of their lips together that left the other members screaming all around them as Yeonho took his last few bites of pepero, a kiss that went on long enough that Dongheon knew exactly what was happening, and felt everything, and even had the time to notice and appreciate the full softness of Yeonho’s mouth. 

And the wildest thing of all was that Dongheon had not just _let_ it happen. No, the truth was, somewhere deep down inside, Dongheon had _wanted_ it to happen, and he was reluctant to let it end. 

And it was only upon that critical realization, and with Yeonho himself continuing to press forward in their kiss without any sign of stopping, that Dongheon was finally able to snap out of whatever weird trance he had fallen under in those precious few seconds, Dongheon finally coming to his senses to gently pull himself away and leave only a tiny fraction of the pepero still remaining clenched tight between his teeth. 

From there, the game had gone on like nothing had happened. Other members played with Dongheon, some kept a safe distance, some got uncomfortably close and even had to hold Dongheon in place to keep him from pulling away too quickly, but Dongheon was able to stop them from going too far, making it clear by his immediate rejection that only the slightest bit of contact would be tolerated for the sake of their beloved fans who enjoyed this kind of thing no matter who it was and no matter that Dongheon was only thinking of one person the entire time. 

And really, Dongheon’s mind had flown away completely, because yeah, with Yeonho too, it was just supposed to be a game, it wasn’t supposed to be so deep, but the simple truth of it all was that Yeonho was different, and Dongheon feels a deep sort of satisfaction about finally being able to admit it to himself, a weight lifted from his shoulders that he only now realizes that he had been carrying for a long, long time without ever really knowing. Well, honestly, he had always known, somewhere deep down, but he had never truly understood. 

Yeonho had kissed him and he had liked it, there was no way around it and there was nothing left to be said. 

And even now, as Dongheon keeps replaying the whole thing over and over again in his mind, he can’t stop feeling that wonderful, wild bubble in his chest as Yeonho approached him with anticipation, playing the part of both the lovely romantic and the sexy bad boy, singing Dongheon a sweet song before pushing forward with a fearlessness the likes of which Dongheon had never imagined could come from sweet, gentle Yeonho, and Dongheon can’t stop feeling Yeonho’s lips on his, can’t stop feeling the heat of Yeonho’s mouth and the electricity of the tension between them that left Dongheon boneless and breathless, swept right up off of his feet and into the sky. 

Yeonho, who had always been like Dongheon’s real little brother, docile and cute and adorable, but who also had always been Dongheon’s closest companion, always there for him as a warm, solid support, Dongheon’s ultimate source of comfort, had become something else, something fierce and intense, something crackling with fire that had ignited a spark deep down within Dongheon’s belly and set it ablaze, because Dongheon had always held a deep affection for Yeonho, and of course that was never a secret, and Dongheon had maybe even always been aware of some kind of more-than-platonic feelings that he harbored for Yeonho too, but it was never like this, where now, it’s like his entire world has been turned upside-down, or like he’s finally opened his eyes and is seeing the world clearly for the first time. 

Because really, when on Earth had Yeonho grown up so much? When did Yeonho become so manly, when did Yeonho become so incredibly _hot?_

Dongheon thinks again of Yeonho’s mouth, and of his rich, deep voice commanding him to bite, and he feels another rush of heat flood his body at the same time that he’s snapped out of his internal struggle by the commotion all around him, because he’s supposed to be getting ready to leave the broadcast station with the others, and instead, he’s been standing off in the corner of the room, leaning up against the wall and staring blankly into space like his life is flashing before his eyes. 

He had already changed out of his stage outfit, and is now down to just a white t-shirt and jeans, and he should feel comfortable and relaxed in casual clothes, but instead, he feels incredibly tense, and he blinks slowly, watches the staff and the other members around him packing up with a detached focus, everyone else doing other things and not paying him much attention. Dongheon is known for his eccentricity, and for occasionally needing time alone to decompress from a schedule, and so everyone knows to leave him be when he gets like this, but Dongheon knows that it won’t be long before they’ve all got to leave, and he doesn’t think he can make it without doing something about this, without releasing everything that’s swirling around inside him and threatening to burst. 

Dongheon needs to find Yeonho. He needs to tell him now or he’ll die from it. 

Dongheon leaves the room and goes out into the hallway, wanders around for a while until he finally spots his dongsaeng assisting some of the staff with packing up some equipment. Yeonho had changed already too, and Dongheon has to hold back from drooling as he gives Yeonho a quick up and down, Dongheon’s eyes dragging indulgently over Yeonho’s thick, solid body hugged tight by a fitted black t-shirt, and then over Yeonho’s lush, heavenly thighs and the perfectly round curve of his ass cradled snugly by black jeans. 

And Dongheon doesn’t hesitate one bit, Dongheon’s usual shyness when it comes to things like this dissolved away into nothing, his newfound assertiveness spurred on by the fire that’s blazing bright in his heart, and he strides up to Yeonho, grabs his hand, and drags him away without a word, Yeonho looking at him a bit surprised but going along with it immediately, the obedient, easygoing Yeonho that Dongheon has always known. 

Their shoes squeak loudly on the floor, and Dongheon is dragging them down the hallway so fast that they’re almost in a jog, Dongheon’s body moving automatically fueled by adrenaline, and he keeps going until they find a deserted section of the building, far off to the side with not as many people around, not any people around at all, actually, and even then, Dongheon keeps pulling Yeonho along until he spots an empty dressing room, where he quickly flicks on the lights and pulls Yeonho inside behind him before releasing Yeonho’s hand and striding away to the other side of the room, bracing his hands against the wall and hanging his head down, breathing heavily as he collects himself for a moment with his eyes squeezed shut. 

Dongheon is sweating and flushed, his mind going crazy, scrambling desperately as it catches up with everything that he’s just done, his fingers curling uselessly against the smooth, cold surface of the wall, and Dongheon leans forward, pressing his forehead to that same cool surface and flinching slightly as it makes contact with his hot, burning skin. He feels like he’s burning up from the inside out, like there’s smoke coming out of his ears and his bright red cheeks. 

And Yeonho, of course, can tell that something is up, and he has the sense to close and lock the door to give them some privacy before he speaks up, confused but cautious as he steps towards Dongheon. 

“Hyung?” Yeonho asks, and his voice is so beautiful and clear that Dongheon feels like he wants to cry, he loves that sweet voice so much. “Is everything alright?” 

Dongheon doesn’t answer, he’s too focused on slowing his breathing and calming himself down for a few more moments, and Yeonho is so good, so patient, Dongheon can hear him lean up against the wall by the door, giving Dongheon his space, and Dongheon knows that poor Yeonho must be anxious, must be thinking that he did something wrong or that something is wrong with Dongheon, must be worried and wondering if Dongheon is about to yell at him or come rushing at him crying and in need of his comfort. It certainly wouldn’t be the first time for either of those scenarios, but really, Dongheon is just trying to pull himself together, trying to think about how to tell Yeonho the truth without completely destroying their friendship. 

Dongheon doesn’t think that he’d be able to live with that, the latter thought like a knife stabbing and twisting into his chest, and he chuckles bitterly as he stands up straight, his hands sliding slowly down the wall as pressure pushes behind his eyes. It’s then that he hears Yeonho carefully walking towards him from behind, cautious and quiet like Dongheon is a frightened wild animal, Yeonho murmuring “hyung” and it’s like he’s wrapping his hands right around Dongheon’s heart and squeezing hard. 

Yeonho reaches out to place a comforting hand on Dongheon’s shoulder, and it’s too tender, it’s too loving, and it’s then that Dongheon has his outburst, the tension that’s been building and building within him exploding all at once as his body moves without his volition and he turns around quickly, grabbing hold of the front of Yeonho’s t-shirt, fistfuls of soft fabric in his hands as he forces Yeonho back across the room and slams him into the wall on the opposite side with a deep, loud “thunk” that shakes even the floor beneath their feet. 

Dongheon isn’t looking up, his hair hanging down in his eyes as he breathes heavily, his grip on Yeonho’s t-shirt so tight that his knuckles lose color, until he finally lifts his head, his eyes suddenly wet as he meets Yeonho’s gaze and his grip immediately softens, Yeonho’s eyes big, wide, surprised, but caring and concerned, open and empathetic as always, and Dongheon lets out a loud, deep sigh as he releases his grip and wraps his arms around Yeonho’s waist, moving to bury his face in Yeonho’s neck as he hugs him tight. 

And barely a moment passes before Yeonho is returning the hug without question, his arms around Dongheon’s shoulders as he pulls him in close, murmuring wordless, soft sounds of comfort, and it’s so warm and wonderful, and neither of them say anything or move for a few moments as Dongheon calms down, his breathing stabilizing with Yeonho in his arms and Yeonho’s arms around him, until Dongheon is finally able to find the strength to pull away. 

“Hyung, what is it?” Yeonho asks, carefully, as Dongheon pulls back, unwinding from Yeonho as his arms drop to rest at his sides and his head hangs down again, Yeonho’s hands moving to rest on Dongheon’s shoulders, solid and firm. 

And now, Dongheon feels the lump in his throat growing larger as he keeps trying to blink back the water in his eyes, his mind scrambling, because what the fuck is he supposed to do now? This is it, this is the moment, but what is he supposed to say? Where can he even begin? 

“Today was...” he starts, his voice uncharacteristically quiet, timid, and Dongheon is still not looking up, and so he completely misses the way that Yeonho’s cheeks and ears begin to flush red as Yeonho’s lips part. 

“It was crazy, right?” Yeonho offers, letting out a soft chuckle, and despite everything, Dongheon finds himself smiling weakly too, and giving a little nod, still unable to look up. He sighs again, staring straight down at a random spot on the floor, his heart racing, his hands trembling as he opens and closes his fingers over and over, Yeonho’s hands on his shoulders the only thing keeping him steady. 

“There’s something I have to tell you,” Dongheon says, and he bites down into his lower lip as he feels Yeonho’s eyes on him intense and focused. “I don’t know how to say it, but I just have to say it.” 

He pauses and goes quiet, and Yeonho waits patiently, neither of them moving, and as the seconds drag on, each feeling longer and longer, Dongheon feels everything swelling up in his chest and climbing up through his throat, and he lets out another little chuckle, his eyes stinging, but the words are stuck, too heavy to push out. 

“I...” Dongheon tries again, but it fades away and just makes it more difficult to keep going, his hands curling into fists at his sides from frustration, his fingers digging into his palms. 

It’s really the thought of things going terribly wrong, of everything being ruined between them because of Dongheon’s stupid feelings, that is so paralyzing, that’s holding him back from spilling out his heart. More than anything in the world, Dongheon treasures his friendship with Yeonho, and he doesn’t think he could live with it if he didn’t have Yeonho by his side as always, if things became irreparably weird or uncomfortable between them because of this. 

And for a moment, Dongheon considers just brushing this all off, just giving up entirely on confessing and playing this like it was an anxiety attack of some kind, like it wasn’t ever about anything else, like it wasn’t about the way that Yeonho has Dongheon so twisted and tangled and so fully and thoroughly fallen for him. Yeonho is used to Dongheon and his erratic behavior, it wouldn’t be anything out of the ordinary, and they could share a nice hug and call it a day, and Dongheon could just do the smart thing and bury it all down deep, lock it up and throw away the key. 

Because really, if things go wrong between them, Dongheon wouldn’t be the only one suffering from it. He wouldn’t be the only one losing his best friend, he’d be taking that away from Yeonho too, he’d be hurting Yeonho too, and that’s something that Dongheon doesn’t think that he could live with either. He’ll suffer in silence forever if that’s what it takes to protect Yeonho, because he could never do that to him, he could never hurt him so terribly. 

Dongheon just keeps staring down as he turns over everything in his head again, his breathing starting to slow, his heart steadying as the resolve washes over him all the way down to his fingertips and his toes, as it settles in, a sad, bitter taste of acceptance on the back of his tongue, but he makes up his mind, sighing, and he swallows hard, and Yeonho is still holding onto him, squeezing gently at Dongheon’s shoulders, and it makes it all somehow even worse. 

“It’s nothing,” Dongheon says, voice quiet. 

But then, Yeonho’s hands are reaching to cup Dongheon’s face, and Dongheon can’t help it but to look at him then, and it’s clear that Yeonho isn’t buying his act for even a second. Of course he isn’t, Yeonho sees right through him, always knows exactly what Dongheon is thinking, knows him better than he even knows himself. Yeonho holds Dongheon’s face in his hands, his thumbs resting on Dongheon’s cheeks, and Dongheon is laid completely bare, and they stare into each other’s eyes in silence, Yeonho’s eyebrows furrowing. 

“It’s not nothing,” Yeonho murmurs. “Tell me what’s going on, Heon.” 

But Dongheon can tell by the look in Yeonho’s eyes that he knows exactly what is going on, and it’s one of those moments when the five-year age difference between them has dissolved away into nothing, where it feels like they are on completely equal standing, and Dongheon feels cared for in Yeonho’s hands, feels protected and safe despite being at his most vulnerable. Because really, Yeonho has always been loyal to him, has always stayed by his side through everything, and has always understood him in a way that no one else could, and even now, Dongheon feels foolish for thinking that he could ever hide anything from him, or that he would ever even need to, not when Yeonho has always accepted him, has always loved him unconditionally. 

And Dongheon really, really wants to cry now, because of course Yeonho must already know, how could he have missed it when Dongheon is like an open book to him? And if he’d known this whole time and it hadn’t changed a thing between them, then surely Dongheon hadn’t been wrong in what his instincts had been telling him, then surely it means... 

Because Dongheon knows Yeonho inside and out, too, and when he thinks back on all of those moments, when they’d be together just the two of them and Yeonho had this certain shine in his eyes that Dongheon had never seen anywhere else, or when they’d be laughing and laughing and this special kind of hush would settle around them, or when they’d let all of their walls down and what passed between them was raw and real, Dongheon realizes that he had always felt it, had always instinctively known, but he had brushed it all off as misunderstanding, as wishful thinking. 

Really, it had all been just as obvious as Dongheon’s own feelings, and it had always been there. It had always been Yeonho. Yeonho, who was always there for him, who always took care of him, who never judged or abandoned him even when he was at his worst, even when anyone else would’ve long grown tired of him. Yeonho had limitless patience and understanding when it came to Dongheon, Yeonho was the one who always gave him everything and still always tried to give more. 

And today, the pepero game, it had been stupid and silly, but it was also the perfect answer to that same lingering question. Dongheon hadn’t pulled away, yes, but neither had Yeonho stopped pushing forward, pushing the boundary, because with the two of them, there was never any boundary at all. They had both understood the unspoken truth, they had only stopped at the last possible moment when they could still excuse it, because how would they have been able to explain it otherwise? Really, it had all been confirmation of what they had both been dancing around for a long time, maybe even for years. 

And now, with the way that Yeonho is looking at him, with the silent but absolute understanding that’s passing between them and with Yeonho’s hands on his face, it’s undeniable, it’s unmistakable, and Dongheon realizes that he had had it all wrong, but only because he had been too scared to recognize the truth, only because he had denied it for fear that it was all too good to be true. But there was never any reason to fear, because it was always there, ready for whenever the two of them would be brave enough to take that next step forward. 

Dongheon trusts Yeonho absolutely, and he trusts the two of them absolutely, and whatever happens, Dongheon knows that they’ll work it out, that they’ll make it through together just like they always do. They’ll never leave each other, and they’ll never let each other go, and Dongheon looks at Yeonho and gives him a weak smile, his face flushing. 

“Heon, what is it?” Yeonho asks, voice impossibly quiet. 

“I think you know, Yeono-ya,” Dongheon says, and he half-smirks, trying to be cheeky, trying to act like he isn’t more terrified now than he’s ever been in his life. 

And Yeonho blinks slowly as they keep looking at each other, and Dongheon sees something profound filling up in Yeonho’s beautiful, expressive eyes, and he sees it wash over Yeonho’s face and settle into his gaze, and Yeonho smiles gently, his eyes going half-lidded, and suddenly, Dongheon doesn’t feel scared at all. He still feels nervous, his heart pounding so hard now that he thinks it might explode, but it’s for a completely different reason, and his skin is tingling with a distinct kind of electricity. It’s all anticipation that he’s feeling now. 

“I do know,” Yeonho says, and Dongheon’s heart keeps racing, the look in Yeonho’s eyes sending a shiver up his spine and holding him stuck in place. “I’ve known for a long time.” 

And Yeonho doesn’t hesitate, holding Dongheon’s face in his hands as he leans forward, both of their eyes slipping closed as Yeonho kisses Dongheon fully, Dongheon’s breath catching in his chest, his heart stopping and then thumping hard and deep, flooding his body with warmth and an absolute bliss that furrows his eyebrows as he drinks it in, and it all feels so perfectly natural that Dongheon can't remember why he had been so afraid. It seems so silly now, and even sillier as Yeonho moves his mouth against Dongheon’s and Dongheon moans into it, Dongheon opening up and falling down, falling apart for Yeonho so easily. 

Yeonho pulls away after a long moment, still holding on to Dongheon’s cheeks, and they both open their eyes together to look at each other, and Dongheon knows that his own face is burning red, but Yeonho’s blush is so devastatingly gorgeous, his lips parted and wet, and Dongheon just can’t take it anymore, he can’t hold back anymore, and so he closes his eyes and surges forward, reaches for Yeonho’s soft face to grasp in his hands, Yeonho dropping his own hands in surprise and his eyes slipping closed again as Dongheon kisses him passionately and slams him back up against the wall, Dongheon pressing his body against Yeonho’s as an entirely new kind of desire pulses through him and heats his blood white-hot. 

Yeonho’s hands drop down to Dongheon’s hips, tentative at first, but as Dongheon kisses him over and over again, each kiss deeper and wetter, Dongheon tilting his head for a perfect kiss each time as he pushes his body forward into Yeonho’s and moans into his mouth like he’s dying, Yeonho starts to grip harder, his fingers digging into the fabric of Dongheon’s jeans, and Yeonho moans beautifully and starts to kiss back, their tongues pressing against each other, Dongheon’s mind going so fast, flipping over itself because he wants so much but doesn’t even know where to begin. 

And so Dongheon just keeps kissing Yeonho, his kisses growing erratic and fluttery as his hands start to wander down Yeonho’s face and neck, and then down Yeonho’s body, Dongheon's fingers skimming down Yeonho’s collarbone, then down Yeonho’s chest, Yeonho whining as Dongheon’s palms run over his pectoral muscles, as Dongheon’s palms rub down over Yeonho’s hard nipples and then back up, and Dongheon rubs over and over again as he keeps kissing and pushing Yeonho harder and harder into the wall behind him, and Dongheon wishes he could rip off Yeonho’s clothes and touch and kiss every inch of his glorious warm skin, wishes he could rip off his own clothes so they could fuck right there on the floor and roll around on each other until they’re both exhausted and weeping. 

They keep kissing, and Yeonho keeps squeezing at Dongheon’s hips as Dongheon’s hands move down Yeonho’s belly, and more than anything, Dongheon wishes that they didn’t have to settle for something so fast and messy, he wishes they could have something deep and slow, wishes they could spend hours just kissing and touching and indulging in each other’s bodies. And he’ll make sure of it himself that they can have more than this, but not today, today they just don’t have the time or the capability, being where they are right now, at a broadcast studio, their absence to be noticed any minute now, and Dongheon is nothing if not efficient and delibrate when he wants something, his hands sliding down further and going right for the buttons of Yeonho’s jeans. 

Dongheon suddenly pulls away from Yeonho’s lips, resting his forehead against Yeonho’s as the two of them take a moment to breathe, both of them panting heavily into each other’s open mouths, and they’ve still got their eyes closed, Dongheon now focused on undoing the buttons and zipper of Yeonho’s pants and slipping his hands inside, Yeonho gasping out a quiet, “hyung” as Dongheon immediately takes hold of him without hesitation. Yeonho is already half-hard, dripping wet and hot in Dongheon’s hands, Dongheon’s voice shaking even as he puts on an air of confidence. 

“God, you’re so big,” Dongheon murmurs, shivering as Yeonho’s hands drop from Dongheon’s hips and Yeonho whines, curling back submissively, hands falling to the wall on either side of him, fingers gripping uselessly as Dongheon pulls out Yeonho’s cock and starts to stroke him with both hands, their foreheads still pressed together and their eyes still shut tight, the air between their mouths hot and wet, and Dongheon can’t say that he hasn’t thought about this before, can’t say he didn’t know that Yeonho would be even sexier than he had ever even imagined. 

Because the truth is, Dongheon _had_ imagined, had imagined many times before. There had been plenty of nights, nights that, up until now, he would’ve denied remembering, where, when playing with himself, Dongheon would have Yeonho’s face and Yeonho’s body in mind, and he’d imagine Yeonho’s cock and how it would feel in his hands and in his mouth and inside of him, but he had always brushed it off, it had been so easy to pretend it didn’t mean anything when he was half-asleep and all alone in his own mind. He had always waved it away as nothing more than the fact that Yeonho was the person Dongheon saw the most every day, and it was all just Dongheon’s brain popping out a comforting, familiar face when he was stressed and exhausted and trying to get off as quickly as possible before passing out for the night. 

And yes, the thought of Yeonho always had Dongheon coming fast and hard with barely any effort at all, like a horny teenager barely experienced with their own body who saw one naughty picture and went crazy, but Dongheon had always downplayed its significance, had always tried not to think about it too much, because how could he? How could he face the thought that all this time, he had had such a strong, such an overwhelming and _unholy_ desire for his sweet, innocent dongsaeng, who he truly regarded as his beloved little brother? How could he ever look Yeonho in the eyes if he ever fully acknowledged that he thought about him like that when he was all alone in the dark? 

Dongheon feels his chest starting to tighten, pressure building in his lower body and firing up every cell as he strokes Yeonho’s cock up and down at a steady pace, squeezing gently and flicking his wrists as he strokes, running his fingers along every ridge and vein and keeping Yeonho completely paralyzed against the wall, moans spilling out of Yeonho’s throat and Yeonho’s mouth hanging open and Yeonho’s eyebrows furrowed like something straight out of a naughty video, a sight that Dongheon is sad to have to miss as he moves in closer and closer until their chests are pressed together and Yeonho’s chin rests on his shoulder, Dongheon pressing his pelvis in against Yeonho’s to feel Yeonho’s body against his own cock straining inside his underwear and his too-tight jeans, Yeonho’s hands finally moving to wrap around him and to rest low on his back. 

And Dongheon is starting to sweat again, can feel it dripping down the side of his face, and he’s getting so hard so quickly just from this, his underwear growing damp as he leaks on himself while he keeps pumping his hands, starting to go much more slowly, squeezing more deliberately and squeezing harder, and the frustration is becoming painful, Dongheon shallowly rubbing himself against Yeonho, cursing under his breath because it only makes it worse. And Yeonho whines as Dongheon rubs against him, Yeonho starting to spurt and leak onto Dongheon’s fingers, and Yeonho is trembling, curling in forward to Dongheon’s body, and Dongheon knows he must already be getting close, because it seems that Yeonho, too falls apart just as easily, and Dongheon wonders if he was not alone in his secret nighttime thoughts about the two of them. 

And like this, Yeonho is unable to hold back any longer, squeezing at Dongheon’s body and moaning brokenly as Dongheon leans into him, and Yeonho is so damn loud, making the filthiest, most beautiful noises right into Dongheon’s ears, sporadic and shaky as he throbs in Dongheon’s hands, Yeonho’s body hot like a furnace and his hands pressed hard on Dongheon’s back, gripping tight to fistfuls of Dongheon’s t-shirt, and it’s everything that Dongheon wants, the two of them melting together like this, Dongheon’s head lolling to the side against Yeonho’s as he loses himself in what he’s doing, and Dongheon starts to whine from the pain of how aroused he is, he feels like he can’t breathe as he starts to hump Yeonho’s thigh, and he’s getting so close himself, it’s like torture. 

And in another sudden burst of fire, Dongheon lets go of Yeonho’s cock and pulls back, quickly and roughly grabbing for Yeonho’s shoulders and spinning the both of them around to switch positions as the momentum has his own back hitting the wall with a loud “thump” that leaves him breathless, Dongheon’s eyes flickering open at the same moment that Yeonho’s do, Yeonho’s hands still fisted in Dongheon’s t-shirt, and the two of them stare at each other, panting for a long moment, Yeonho’s pupils blown wide with desire, Yeonho flushed all the way down his neck and up over his ears, his mouth hanging open and glossy-wet with spit. 

There’s another long, long beat of silence that passes between them as they gaze into each other’s eyes breathing heavily, and Dongheon is already addicted to Yeonho’s taste, he needs his mouth on him again or he’ll die, and so he wraps his arms around Yeonho’s neck and as their eyes fall shut together, Dongheon pulls Yeonho in close for another steamy kiss, much slower, much deeper, much hotter than before as they both moan loudly into it, Yeonho’s arms moving to slip around Dongheon’s waist and pull him in closer, Yeonho’s cock pressing against Dongheon’s abs through the thin fabric of Dongheon’s t-shirt and Yeonho moving in, pushing Dongheon into the wall as he starts to take control. 

And they make out like that up against the wall for a long time, Yeonho pressing forward while Dongheon pulls him in, Dongheon’s back rubbing up against the wall behind him, slowing their fire to a bubbling simmer, passionate and intense as they kiss and kiss hot and heavy like they have all the time in the world, suddenly focused on kissing and nothing else, Dongheon’s hands moving to tangle in Yeonho’s hair as he licks his way into Yeonho’s mouth and Yeonho rubs himself forward against Dongheon’s stomach and pelvis, both of them moaning loud, their sounds all swirled together in their mouths and down each other’s throats. 

And they keep kissing and it keeps getting hotter and messier and wetter as Dongheon pulls hard at Yeonho’s hair and Yeonho’s hands release Dongheon’s t-shirt, moving around to the front of Dongheon’s jeans, and Yeonho is much clumsier than Dongheon with this, it takes him a few tries with shaking hands to get the buttons open and the zipper down, and Dongheon takes advantage of Yeonho’s fumbling and starts to dominate the kisses, devouring Yeonho’s mouth as Yeonho whines and submits to Dongheon’s control, Yeonho’s hands shaking so much that it takes him a moment even to just slip them into Dongheon’s underwear, and he stalls for a few seconds as Dongheon pulls Yeonho in even closer, Dongheon’s entire body aching with the need to fuse the two of them together into the wall. 

Dongheon pulls away again, reluctantly, for another moment to breathe, pulling Yeonho’s head forward to rest his forehead on Dongheon’s shoulder as Dongheon leans back to rest his head against the wall, eyes shut as his chest heaves and his face tilts to the ceiling, and it’s then that Yeonho is able to finally work his hands inside of Dongheon’s underwear to pull out Dongheon’s cock, Dongheon nearly screaming as Yeonho pulls him out and gives him just a few timid, shy strokes before releasing his cock to bob up against Dongheon’s stomach, because Dongheon is already fully aroused, and Yeonho pulls back then, Dongheon lowering his head, his arms draping around Yeonho’s neck and Yeonho’s hands moving to Dongheon’s hips. 

And what little space there is between them feels increasingly magnetic, drawing them in closer, but at the same time, the more they hesitate, the greater the anticipation in those excrutiating, amazing few seconds, and they keep their eyes closed as they breathe it all in, until the tension breaks and they’re kissing again, because they just can’t get enough of each other, and Yeonho is pushing in even harder, both of their cocks pressed between their stomachs and gliding against each other, Dongheon’s back rubbing up against the wall behind him and lifting his shirt, his bare skin rubbing against the cold concrete. 

Yeonho’s hands then start to slip around Dongheon’s body, around to the back of Dongheon’s jeans and down past the waistband of Dongheon’s underwear to grab and squeeze at Dongheon’s bare ass as he pushes his pelvis in closer, their cocks now pressed tight between their stomachs, the two of them breaking apart from their kiss so that they can slot in perfectly like two puzzle pieces, chins on each other’s shoulders as they perfectly wind together, Dongheon’s arms draped loosely over Yeonho’s shoulders, one hand cradling the back of Yeonho’s head and fisting in his hair and the other grabbing uselessly at the muscle between his shoulders, fisting in his t-shirt. 

Their heartbeats are pounding hard and fast against each other, both of their bodies hot and thrumming with lust, and Yeonho fidgets a bit in place before carefully removing one hand from Dongheon’s underwear, and Dongheon can hear Yeonho suck on his own fingers, Dongheon’s blood rushing hot at the thought of what Yeonho is about to do, Dongheon curling forward in anticipation as Yeonho slides his hand back down Dongheon’s back and into his underwear, Dongheon feeling a fresh flush spread over his entire body as he feels Yeonho start to tease a finger inside of him. 

And it’s a slight burn at first, but it’s welcome and familiar, because after all, Dongheon has done this to himself many times, has imagined Yeonho’s fingers many times, and the real thing is so, _so_ much better, Yeonho’s soft hands gripping his ass, and Yeonho is so careful and lovely, and Dongheon hugs him tighter, the both of them breathing so heavily that Dongheon is getting a bit dizzy from it, he’s choking on it, barely able to breathe at all, gasping as Yeonho starts working him open, moving his finger around in circles and stretching him, tenderly, timidly fucking his finger in and out of Dongheon’s entrance as he goes, so sweet that Dongheon starts to cry, tears budding at the corners of his eyes. 

And Yeonho soon adds a second finger, and then a third, his fingers slick with spit and sliding easily, and Dongheon starts to moan from the immense pleasure that soon overtakes any pain, that sends heat crawling up his spine and bundling tight in his core, and he can tell that Yeonho is nervous and inexperienced with this, but he’s also a total natural at it, and soon, Yeonho is winding his fingers inside of Dongheon perfectly, fucking in and out perfectly, hitting all of the right spots until Dongheon is shaking and tears are spilling down his cheeks and he’s squeezing around Yeonho’s fingers, desperate for more, desperate to be full of him. 

Yeonho goes on for a bit longer, and pressed close like this, Dongheon can feel Yeonho’s breath stuttering in his chest, can _feel_ the way that Yeonho’s eyebrows are furrowing and his nose is scrunching with the soft, exquisite little moans tumbling out from Yeonho’s throat, because as Dongheon squeezes around Yeonho’s fingers, Dongheon’s stomach rubs against Yeonho’s cock, keeping Yeonho right at the sweet spot without pushing him over the edge, and Dongheon is getting much too frustrated, he’s so close, he needs Yeonho inside of him _now_. 

“Idiot, I’m ready,” Dongheon slurs out, panting and tugging hard at Yeonho’s hair. “God, I’m so ready. Please.” 

And Dongheon would normally feel humiliated at the obvious desperation in his voice, but he just can’t be bothered to give a fuck right now, not when they’re so close and he needs Yeonho so bad, with every cell in his body like he’s never needed anything before, and in a matter of seconds, Yeonho is pulling back, his hands slipping out from Dongheon’s pants and reaching around for the waistband of Dongheon’s jeans and underwear to pull them down. 

But in that moment, Dongheon suddenly has a wild thought, and he stops Yeonho with a hand to Yeonho’s chest, Yeonho’s heart pounding hard beneath his palm, and they make eye contact, Yeonho’s eyes lit with a fire that Dongheon knows is matched in his own, and Dongheon doesn’t say a word as he smirks, lowering his hand and carefully turning around to face the wall. 

Dongheon hears Yeonho let out an incredulous little laugh, and Yeonho quickly moves in to press up behind him, Dongheon letting out his own scandalous little chuckle and closing his eyes, splaying his hands flat on the concrete, pressing his cheek and his cock to the wall as Yeonho pulls down Dongheon’s pants and underwear to his thighs, and Dongheon hears him momentarily readying himself, a silence falling between them full of carnal desire and crackling electricity and...something else. 

Yeonho is hesitating again, his hands timidly hovering around Dongheon’s hips but not quite touching him, because Yeonho is really just too lovely, too tender a person to just go ahead and fuck him, and it makes Dongheon’s heart ache in a bittersweet pulse, because this is why it’s always been Yeonho, this is why Dongheon has fallen so fully and completely, so stupidly and hopelessly for him, and it’s why Dongheon will give him everything and more when they have the chance, when the time comes for Dongheon to return everything that Yeonho has given him, to show Yeonho just how much he loves him. 

But for now, this is the best that they can do, this is the way to release some of what’s been building between them all this time and to take things to the next level before they both die from it, and Dongheon is going to start yelling at Yeonho if he doesn’t hurry up, because he’s in agony from waiting, from being so close and from running out of time, every precious second bringing them closer and closer to having to tear themselves apart from each other. 

And just as Dongheon is about to start screaming like a goddamn cat in heat, he feels Yeonho finally, _finally_ start to push himself inside, and even with the prep from his fingers, it’s a painful stretch, it burns, but it’s _so good_ , it’s incredible, it’s delicious, and Dongheon keels forward into the wall, moaning long and loud and not giving a fuck who hears them outside these walls, and Yeonho moans too, softer and lower, deep in his chest as he takes hold of Dongheon’s hips for stability and pushes inside slow and smooth, inching closer and closer until his chest is pressed to Dongheon’s back and his cock is fully sheathed inside of him, both of them fully flushed and drenched in sweat. 

And it’s then that Yeonho removes his hands from Dongheon’s hips and lifts them to rest over Dongheon’s on the wall, Yeonho resting his chin on Dongheon’s shoulder, and it’s just too, too adorable for what they’re doing, and Dongheon feels a fresh burst of affection for Yeonho, and a mix of hatred at himself, of regret for waiting so long for this. 

Dongheon lets out a pathetic little sob as Yeonho’s hands intertwine with and curl on his, Yeonho himself curling forward into Dongheon as he starts to move and to fuck him slowly into the wall, pushing and pulling in and out with deep rolls of his hips all the way, and again, Dongheon can hear every noise that Yeonho makes right in his ear, every deep moan and every breath caught in his chest, every gorgeous whimper, and he can feel every noise that Yeonho makes roll through his throat and chest and vibrate down through Dongheon’s own body connected to his. 

And Dongheon’s cock is getting pressed into the concrete between the wall and his stomach, Dongheon’s mouth fallen open in ecstasy as Yeonho’s cock stretches him open and plunges deep inside of him, pushing Dongheon into the wall but with such tenderness even as he fucks him hard, and there’s sweat dripping down the side of Dongheon’s face and tears dripping down his cheeks again, because Dongheon has never in his life felt something so good, he feels like he’ll melt as the pleasure constricts his entire body so tight and so hot that it crushes and consumes him. 

And it soon becomes effortless, completely wet and smooth as Dongheon’s body takes Yeonho in perfectly, and it doesn’t take long at all to bring them both right up to the edge where nothing matters but the pleasure of their bodies moving together like this, how could anything else matter when they’re both so gone for each other, and as Yeonho keeps going, faster, harder, deeper, as he starts to slam Dongheon into the wall with each push and pull in and out, they both get so loud, it’s hard to even tell who’s louder, their moans piling on top of each other, until Yeonho is crying out with each thrust and Dongheon starts chanting, “yes, yes, yes,” louder and louder and louder until it breaks entirely into a string of high-pitched yells, Yeonho gripping onto Dongheon’s hands so tight that it’s painful as they both approach climax together, right there together as always and as with everything else. 

And it only takes a few more thrusts with Yeonho going so hard that the wall shakes, once, twice, three times more, and then they’re both coming, Dongheon yelling loud and squeezing hard around Yeonho’s cock as he spills against his own stomach, Yeonho crying out even louder and spilling inside of Dongheon, thrusting through it and squeezing Dongheon’s hands tight as they both shake and tremble in the waves and waves of it coursing through them, and Dongheon’s eyes are stinging wet and he can’t breathe, he can’t feel his body. He can only feel what must be Heaven itself. 

They come down together for the next few minutes, their breathing gradually slowing, softening, heart rates steadying, and Yeonho’s grip on Dongheon’s hands loosens, until Yeonho pulls out carefully, taking a step back away from Dongheon and Dongheon feeling suddenly cold in his absence, turning around slowly even as his limbs feel like jelly. Yeonho has already gotten his pants and underwear back up and is fixing his clothes, and he looks absolutely wrecked, flushed all over and his shirt damp with sweat, breathing heavily with his mouth slightly open, and he’s got that beautiful after-sex glow that makes it look like he’s lit up from the inside out. 

And just after Yeonho fixes himself, he doesn’t look up, but he shyly moves in close again, and ever the obedient dongsaeng, always caring and kind to take care of his hyung, he reaches immediately for Dongheon and helps him to pull up his clothes and fix himself, and Yeonho fumbles with the buttons of Dongheon’s jeans again as he tries to close them, his hands shaking even more than before, and he still won’t look up. 

And Yeonho is so achingly, achingly sweet that Dongheon can’t help it, he surges forward to grab Yeonho’s face and squeeze his cheeks to make him look at him, and they make eye contact, Yeonho suddenly looking so flustered and innocent, back to looking like the babyish Yeonho that Dongheon knew before. Dongheon gives him a gentle smile, dropping his hands to reach down and take Yeonho’s hand between his before he leans forward, his eyes fluttering closed as he tilts his head and gives Yeonho just a single soft kiss, barely a touch. 

And even when he pulls back, Dongheon doesn’t let go of Yeonho’s hand, Dongheon’s eyes fluttering open, and Yeonho’s gaze slips downward as he speaks, voice soft and quiet. “I don’t know what to say,” Yeonho murmurs, and he’s smiling, flushed, clearly feeling giddy and terrified just as Dongheon is. 

“You don’t have to say anything,” Dongheon replies, and he tugs at Yeonho’s hand to pull him back towards him, Dongheon’s back hitting the wall, and he gives Yeonho’s hand a gentle squeeze before releasing it, then reaching to drape his arms around Yeonho’s shoulders, and Yeonho looks into his eyes again and smiles sweetly, Yeonho shyly wrapping his arms around Dongheon’s waist. 

And there’s nothing sexual about it this time as they kiss again, soft and chaste, it’s all pure sweetness that tastes like candy, and there’s no need to try to jump ahead of it, they’ll just go along with it, and now even more than before, Dongheon can’t believe how he was able to live all this time without this. 

And as they kiss again, as Dongheon tilts his head and pulls Yeonho in even closer, Dongheon realizes that no, actually, they weren’t living without this, it was simply waiting for them all this time.

**Author's Note:**

> if you enjoyed this fic, please leave a kudos or comment ❤️
> 
> also check out my [yeonheon twitter](https://twitter.com/yeonheonlove), my [personal twitter](https://twitter.com/yeonheonlife), and my [youtube channel](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCyNcIoyYpPO5KVjZgnvZsOg) ❤️


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